Monday, January 30, 2017

Quaina Shears

Accepting Life

2 comments:

  1. I liked how you gave great detail about the hospital and the funeral. Some readers would also like to know how old she was. On page one there is a few omitted words in some of your sentences. I'm sorry for your loss...

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  2. I really appreciated how your essay is very detailed and emotional. What made you want to write such an emotional essay about your personal experience? In paragraph one, the fourth sentence should end with recovering and the fifth sentence should start with "Instead,". Also in the same sentence you should take out the comma after and. On the second page at the top, you said "honestly didn't even about how...." the contraction needs to be taken out and a word needs to be added. Read over the essay and check over.

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